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Responding To Criticism

Responding to criticism can be easy to do, when you learn to do so, assertively with out attacking or surrendering to the criticism. You may respond to accurate criticism appropriately by acknowledging the criticism with dignity, protecting your self-esteem. Inaccurate criticism can be responded to by "fogging", a gentle technique that protects you and doesn't attack the critic. Vague or over-generalized criticism can be responded to with an appropriate technique of questioning to clarify the issue.

Accurate Criticism

The first step is to acknowledge the criticism and any truth there is to the statement. When the criticism is accurate, acknowledge so, by saying you're right and paraphrasing the criticism, so you both know what you are in agreement about. If a thank you or an explanation seems appropriate, then briefly do so and get on with other things. Don't dwell on the criticism, yet be determined about ways in which you can learn from it.

Record Below Three Examples Of Accurate Criticisms And How You Would Respond:

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Inaccurate Criticism

When you are given an inaccurate criticism, you can use "fogging" as a technique to respond. This involves a token agreement with the critic by agreeing only in part. Example: If someone says you are undependable you can respond by saying that you sometimes forget appointments. You are not agreeing that you are undependable and you are acknowledging that you do forget on occasion. You can also agree about the possibility of the critic being right, by responding with, "Yes, I might be undependable at times." You could also agree just with the principle of the criticism by restating the principle behind the criticism, such as, "You're right, being late is undependable."

Record Below Three Examples Of Inaccurate Criticisms And How You Would Respond:

 

Criticism: ___________________________________________________________________________

Response: ___________________________________________________________________________

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Vague or Over-Generalized Criticism

A lot of criticism is vague and needs to be clarified with questioning before you can decide how to respond. Stay away from why questioning and use how, what, where and when questioning to clarify the details. Example: If someone says that what you are doing annoys them, ask specifically how it is annoying and when it annoys.

 

Record Below Three Examples of Vague and Over-generalized Criticisms and How You Would Respond:

 

Criticism: ___________________________________________________________________________

Response: __________________________________________________________________________

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Criticism: ___________________________________________________________________________

Response: __________________________________________________________________________

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Criticism: __________________________________________________________________________

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